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Valuable Information:

Facts Are Not Meanings,

Lesson from Klemmer & Associates.

Facts Are Not Meanings

--Leaders recognize that facts do not mean
any one thing

Your brain can store 100 trillion facts. Your
mind can handle 15,000 decisions a second. You can
smell 10,000 different odors. Your touch can
detect a 1/25,000 of an inch of difference. You
can taste one part quinine in 2 million parts
water.

So, why is it you don't feel special or
capable? What an absurd notion! I suggest that
something happened and you decided you were not
important or special. Write two words down: FACT
and MEANING.

Facts are experiences, feelings we've had,
while meaning is the "interpretation" we put to
that experience or feeling.

A friend of mine wanted a doll when she was
very young. Her father would not get it for her.
That's a fact. It's something that really
happened. Then she put a meaning to it.
She
decided she wasn't worth it. If she was really
worth it, her dad would have bought the $10 doll.

Can you think of another meaning she could
have put to that very same fact? Sure you can,
such as, "We can't afford it, or Dad does not love
me." Now, think of one or two more meanings.

The point is, we make up meanings for
everything that happens in life. Begin to realize
that you are making the meanings up. Facts are not
meanings! They are two separate things.

Most people take meanings to be true and
believe there could be no other meaning. This is
huge! Leaders, on the other hand, recognize that
facts do not mean any one thing.

If you are in sales, what do you make the
word "No" mean? Suppose it meant something other
than the person wasn't interested?

If you have a boss who did not return a phone
call, what did you make that mean? What if you
picked the wrong meaning?

What happened where you decided you weren't
special? What else could you make that same
experience mean that would help you in living the
life you want? It may not mean that, but at least
pick meanings that support you in the direction
you want to go in life.

When young students completely flunk a test,
they invariably make it mean that they are slow,
stupid, a failure, or something similar. It
doesn't mean that.

For many years I would go into schools and in
10 minutes have the children memorize all the
colonies in the order they signed the
constitution. Then I would have a child stand up
who I knew was flunking. I would get them to give
me the first 13 colonies--in the order they signed
the constitution!
They always got it right.

Then they would do it backwards. They'd go
cross-eyed. They had a mental melt down of sorts,
because now they were thinking they were a genius.

It didn't really mean that, but I would
rather they thought they were a genius, because
that changed their study habits, how they
listened, how they performed on tests--and most
importantly, what they thought about themselves.

TAKEAWAY!

You are special, not because of anything you
have done. It is simply so. Facts in and of
themselves do not have any inherent meaning.

Action Step #1

This week, pretend you are very special. Live
as if you were very unique, valuable, and special.
Talk with a tone of voice as if you were special.
Talk to the people you would normally talk to if
you were special.

Action Step #2

Write down your most vivid memory as a child.

Then, write down everything you made that
mean about you or life. What do you see?

An Example

My friend, Bob Harrison, and I were both
speaking at a large convention in Sweden. He
shared something personal with me he has said is
okay for me to share with you.

His childhood sweetheart and wife of 37 years
had died a little over a year before. He had
started dating again and some of his friends felt
that it was too early to date and that could mean
he had not cared as deeply for his wife as they
had thought.

Bob had loved his wife dearly and was hurt by
their reactions. I told him not to be upset and
showed him why not with my explanation about
fact-and-meaning.

The fact he was dating again did not
necessarily mean that he had not had deep feelings
for her. It could mean that being married to her
was such a wonderful experience that he greatly
missed that kind of relationship. My example
helped to relieve his anxiety.

Months later Bob told me a story that is a
very funny example of fact vs meaning. Bob is a
motivational speaker and he's in front of crowds
of 10,000 and more regularly (www.increase.org).
One occasion he was teaching on increase to a
seminar group. He noticed one individual in the
audience who just didn't seem to be interested in
what he was saying. The man just sat there with
his eyes closed and was not taking any notes of
Bob's presentation. Bob determined that he was
going to get this man to be attentive. He walked
across the stage to a section of the crowd that
was really into his presentation. He got himself
all charged up and went back over to the guy who
had his eyes closed.

Still no reaction! He went back to the highly
motivated section again, talked with them and then
returned to the other side to find the man STILL
had his eyes closed.

About the fifth time of going over to the man
with his eyes closed, Bob went a bit further to
that side and got closer to the man. It was then
that he noticed something in the aisle next to the
man . . . a seeing eye dog. It wasn't that the man
wasn't motivated and not enjoying the teaching. He
was blind!

Bob said, "Never again will I be so quick to
make a fact mean something."

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