I Won't Change My Behavior

By Dr. Gary Chapman  

"I'll apologize, but I won't change. What I'm doing is not wrong. You shouldn't be so sensitive." He was adamant, but his wife was crying.

Craig was a natural joker but many of his jokes were off-color. "Hey, they aren't dirty jokes; just jokes that everyone can identify with. That's why I get so many laughs."

But his wife Betty was not laughing, and his jokes had become a huge issue in their marriage.

The idea that we only need to make changes when we are doing something morally wrong is erroneous.  

In a healthy marriage, we often make changes that have nothing to do with morality, but everything to do with building a harmonious marriage.

Fortunately Craig learned this truth, changed his style of jokes, and he and Betty now lead a marriage enrichment class in their church.

Article written by Dr. Gary Chapman. Based on the book, The Five Languages of Apology by Dr. Gary Chapman and Dr. Jennifer Thomas. Published by Moody Publishing, copyright 2008