Summary of this article
Here is another top "secret" by the Parrotts about how to have a happier marriage. This one is about calling a "time-out" and taking the time to understand your spouse's side of any argument. Listening is one of the hardest things to do if you are upset. Giving another person your time and understanding is one of life's best gifts.
You might be surprised how many times when an argument is going, that the two are actually arguing about different things.
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The "What To Do When You Argue" Secret To A Happier Marriage
By Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott
When you are arguing with your spouse, call a time-out and take turns stating the other person's argument in your own words. Keep stating it until they agree that you have succeeded.
You can even say, "TIME OUT!" From that point, each person must repeat the other person's side of the argument until the other person is satisfied that you understand their side. Then the debate can continue.
Every person in this world wants to be understood. When you interrupt the fight in order to say to your spouse, "I REALLY need to hear and understand what you are saying," then your subconscious message is, "I value you and respect you. What you are saying is important to me."
When people feel understood, the anger often evaporates.
© 2009 Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott, www.RealRelationships.com
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God bless your marriage and family.
Jim Stephens |
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