Marriage Needs To Be Based On Unconditional Promises

By Dr. Gary Chapman  

Most of God's covenants with us require a response on our part in order to enjoy the benefit of God's covenant. But God's covenant is never based on our response.

For example, God is committed to forgiving us our sins, and that covenant is unconditional. In order for us to experience God's forgiveness, however, we must be willing to acknowledge our sin (1 John 1:9). God's covenant promise to forgive us is not conditioned by our response.  

God has made full provision for our sins, and he stands fully ready to forgive at any moment.

God will not withdraw his covenant promise, but if individually we are to experience the benefit of this promise, we must be willing (soft hearted) to respond in confession and faith in Christ.

Thus, "covenant marriages" are characterized by unconditional promises. In traditional wedding vows, the covenant we make with each other is couched in unconditional terms.  

"Wilt thou have this woman to be thy wedded wife? To live together in the holy estate of matrimony; wilt thou love her, comfort her, honor, and keep her, in sickness and in health, and forsaking all others, keep thou only unto her so long as you both shall live?"  

This is the language of "covenant marriage".

Sadly, too many times after couples have verbalized a covenant relationship, they practice a "contract marriage" in which giving is conditioned on the spouse's positive behavior.