How Blue People Challenge Others - Part 5 of 9

By Jim Stephens based on Color Styles by Mary Miscisin

It's easy to jump to conclusions about situations and make guesses about ego battles and family dynamics. However, some circumstances are actually simple misperceptions about personality styles.

If you pay attention to notice the actions and good intentions of the other person, it's easier. How are you perceiving and describing their behaviors? If you really tried, how well can you come up with a positive description for each perceived negative one?

Check out the challenges below from Blues. Know anybody like this? Look at the tips below for dealing with them.

Typical Challenges that Blue People give to others

Blues are sensitive - They take things personally.

 *  They can get their feelings hurt easily.

 *  They may take critiques or suggestions as personal put-downs.

 *  They read "between the lines": interpreting meanings to tone of voice, actions, lack of actions, gestures, glances, etc...

Blues hide their feelings.

 *  If they are mad or they got their feelings hurt, they may try to hide it to avoid conflict.

 *  They pout or withdraw their love.

 *  They may act "cheery" even when they are sad.

 *  They help others,  but they won't ask for help from others.

Blues invade your privacy.

 *  They ask personal questions.

 *  They shares intimate information.

 *  They give hugs and hold eye contact longer than other color styles.

Here are Suggestions on how to deal with Blues these holidays.

Pause for them and pay attention to them.

 *  Show appreciation for them personally. Help them feel included and special.

 *  Think before you speak. Make sure your words match your body language.

 *  When offering feedback, sandwich anything that could be taken as criticism between a positive opening and positive closing.

Reassure them that you value them.

 *  If you are ready for intense emotions and are willing to really listen with an open heart, then in total privacy encourage them to share. Otherwise, appreciate their efforts to keep the peace for the sake of others.

 *  Pay attention to recognize when they need help and offer it if you really want to be of assistance.

Set the stage for them having success with you.

 *  Remember their intention is to connect. Let them know how to best do this.

 *  Redirect their attention. For example, "You know what I'd really love to share with you is..."

 *  Acknowledge them with a smile and nod and hold your boundaries nicely.

Your new paradigm shift.

Past negative ways you might have characterized them:

1. Sensitive      

2. Passive

3. Nosey

New found positive way to look at them:

1. Appreciates a positive approach

2. Nice

3. Caring, interested

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God bless your family and your marriage.

Jim Stephens