Daily Tips from The Marriage Library
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Mort's 50 Ways To Talk And Touch List 
 
By Mort Fertel
 
Summary of this article
 
Mort Fertel proposes alternatives to therapy. Here is a list of 50 ways to connect with your spouse. 
 
Jim 

Mort's 50 Ways To Talk And Touch List

 

By Mort Fertel

 

Do you remember when you used to just talk? Not about who's going to pick up the kids, make the dinner, or pay the bill...I mean just talk for the sake of talking. If you're like most couples, you need to start talking again. Tell your spouse about your dreams. Share your fears. Tell a joke. Talk about the interesting person you met today or the experience you had jogging in the park.

 

In the morning before you part for the day, share something with your spouse. In the middle of day, call your spouse for a Talk Charge. You don't have to be all sweetsie if you don't want to. But make sure you don't discuss anything logistical. And don't fight! Just talk.

 

You and/or your spouse probably feel you don't get enough attention from each other. As discussed, it could be that you need to talk more. But you also probably need to touch more.

 

Reach out and TOUCH your spouse today. Try a warm kiss or a gentle rub. Stroke their cheek or play with their feet. It only takes a moment, but the positive energy can carry you through an entire evening.

 

When you caress your spouse's hand, play with their feet, rub their shoulders, or stroke their cheek, there's a moment there (if you do it RIGHT) when your spouse knows that you are completely connected with them.

 

Fill your marriage with a few of those moments each day and your relationship will begin to change.

 

Now I don't want to leave you hanging...wondering what you're going to say and how you're going to touch. I figure if there's 50 ways to leave your lover, there must be at least as many ways to touch them or talk to them. So here's my "50 ways" list.

 

Don't be overwhelmed. Most of these won't work for you. I created 50 so you would have options. My challenge to you is to pick 2; in the next 24 hours do 1 Talk Charge and 1 Touch Charge.

 

1. Express confidence in one of your spouse's decisions

 

2. Share dessert with one fork

 

3. What was "your song" when you were dating? Call your spouse and sing it to them.

 

4. Surprise visit your spouse at their office or home and give them a kiss... and then leave.

 

5. Play footsie next time you sit together

 

6. Learn a new joke today and share it with your spouse

 

7. Ask how your spouse's day went... and really listen

 

8. Kiss your spouse upon waking

 

9. Kiss your spouse before sleeping

 

10. Caress your spouse's hand

 

11. Touch your spouse's cheek or hand while driving

 

12. Rub shoulders next time you sit next to each other

 

13. Sit on your spouse's lap or sit them on yours

 

14. Compliment something your spouse is wearing

 

15. Call your spouse out of the blue to let them know you are thinking of them

 

16. Give your spouse a neck or shoulder massage

 

17. Share a story from the news or your day that you thought was interesting

 

18. What about dancing before dinner? No one's looking.

 

19. Tell your spouse that if you had to do it all over again, you'd choose them

 

20. Share a problem - thank your spouse for their concern

 

21. Play with your spouse's hair while talking in bed

 

22. Fall asleep holding hands

 

23. Remind your spouse to drive safely next time they leave the house

 

24. Call your spouse at work with the latest news.

 

25. Have a tickle "fight"

 

26. Say "I'm sorry" about a mistake you recently made

 

27. Think of 3 ways your spouse has made you a better person ... tell them now

 

28. Compliment your spouse on your favorite physical trait

 

29. Play Twister and let yourself laugh out loud

 

30. Look at your spouse when they are unaware of your gaze ... share your feelings

 

31. Share what you most admire about your spouse

 

32. Have a "remember when?" moment.

 

33. Thank your spouse for helping you through a challenging time in your life

 

34. Find a reason to touch your spouse when you are in the same room

 

35. Dig out the wedding album and reminisce

 

36. Hold hands under the table

 

37. Brush your mate's hair out of his/her eyes

 

38. Straighten his tie, being sure to touch him with love

 

39. Button or zip her dress, being sure to touch her with love

 

40. Knead the same dough together

 

41. Kiss in the elevator when no one is looking

 

42. Express confidence in your spouse's ability to overcome a problem

 

43. Listen to your spouse's worries - ask how you can help

 

44. Make your spouse's lunch for the day ... deliver it with a kiss

 

45. Send your spouse a fax with your special "code words" for I Love You!

 

46. Turn off your spouse's alarm clock...wake them with a massage

 

47. Kiss the back of your spouse's neck while he/she is reading

 

48. Before parting, tell your spouse you can't wait to see him/her again

 

49. An extra hug for no reason at all never hurt anyone

 

50. "Spoon" your mate while sleeping

 

Mort Fertel graduated from the Wharton School and the University of Pennsylvania, was the CEO of an international non-profit organization, and a former marathon runner. He lives with his wife

and 4 children (including triplets!) in Baltimore, Maryland.

 

CONTACT INFORMATION

Marriage Fitness with Mort Fertel

3410 Bancroft Road

Baltimore, MD 21215

Phone: 410.764.1552

Web: http://www.MortFertel.com

 
Here is Mort's website where you can get all 7 Secrets for your mariage and much more. www.marriagemax.com.
_____________________________________________________
 
 
God bless your marriage and family.
 
Jim Stephens
 

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The Marriage Library