Summary of this article
I picked this article because Dr. Chapman makes a very moving case for why we need to learn to deeply communicate in our marriages. I say "learn" because it is always a process. Most couples are unbalanced when it comes to talking, i.e. one talks more easily and in much larger quantities than the other. The person who talks less must learn to how to share his/her heart and feelings more. The person who talks more easily must learn to hold back their own thoughts and draw out the more quiet person. If he/she doesn't, then the more quiet person will naturally tend to talk less and less. The person who talks more will never experience intimacy UNLESS he/she gives adequate space for the quiet partner to also share deeply. Jim
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Communication Is Required In Marriage
By Dr. Gary Chapman
When God said of Adam and Eve, "The two shall become one flesh", he was not speaking only of physical oneness. In marriage, all of life is to be shared, and shared so deeply that it can be said of us, "we become one".
Communication is the vehicle by which we attain this kind of intimacy.
If we are to become one and enjoy the warm flow of life, we must both communicate.
We cannot know each other unless we confide in each other. The apostle Paul put his finger on this truth when he said: "For who among men knows the thoughts of a man except the man's spirit within him?" We cannot reach into each other's minds.
If your spouse is to know your thoughts, feelings, and desires, then you must choose to reveal them.
Only then can they possibly understand you. Communication is the life-line of marriage. Without it the marriage fails. With it, deep, satisfying intimacy is possible.
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God bless your family and your marriage.
Jim Stephens |
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