7 Beliefs that Stop Moms from Making Self-Care a Priority
 

By Lori Radun

Why do moms wait until they are falling apart to take care of themselves? What stops us from practicing self-care on a regular basis?  There are seven beliefs that I believe stop moms from making self-care a priority.
 
1. My kids need me.
 
This is a valid belief, right? Our kids do need us. But not all the time. And aren't there other people who can help take care of the kids? Why do flight attendants tell us to put on our oxygen mask first before assisting our children?  Because we are of no help to our children if we can't take care of ourselves first. Without regular self-care, we become the irritable and impatient mother we don't want to be with our children.
 
2. I don't have time.
 
No doubt mommies are busy. If we are too busy to take some time for ourselves, we need to re-evaluate our time.  Let go of the high expectations we put on ourselves, and let some things slide for a day. Get your children or husband involved with some chores to relieve you. Take a hard look at all the extracurricular activities the family is involved with - are they all necessary? Everyone should have time for self-care, including mom.
 
3. I feel so guilty.
 
A mom wrote in her online journal the other day about how guilty she felt because she was sick and couldn't play with the kids. She felt bad that the kids were left to fend for themselves because she didn't have the energy to entertain them and stimulate their minds. We don't have to be available for our kids 24-7. It's healthy for our kids to learn to entertain themselves. It's okay to leave our kids with the babysitter while we go out with our friend or husband.
 
4. I'll do it tomorrow, or next week.
 
Some moms procrastinate on self-care. Perhaps you are looking for the perfect opportunity to practice self-care.  The perfect circumstances probably aren't going to come. Take an honest look at why you are truly putting off taking care of yourself. Are you allowing some of these beliefs to sabotage you?
 
5. I'm fine - I don't need that.
 
Everyone needs to practice self-care, so don't let the martyr mom take over and convince you otherwise. You may be so used to going through life without taking care of yourself that perhaps you have forgotten how good it feels.  It's even possible that you have disconnected from what makes you happy because you've been so busy making other people happy.
 
6. Nothing else will get done.
 
Believe it or not, you will be more productive when you practice self-care. Taking 20-30 minutes to exercise or sit down and read a good book will not take that much time away from your daily tasks. Believe me, everything will be waiting for you when you get back. And if you ask, someone might just give you a hand and handle a few of your tasks while you are enjoying some much needed "me time".
 
7. I don't have the energy.
 
There is no doubt that motherhood can be draining. Add all the other responsibilities to our lives, and it's not uncommon to be exhausted much of the time. When you practice self-care, however, your energy is refueled.  Make a list of things that make you really happy and participate in those activities on a regular basis.  See if you don't have more physical and emotional energy for your family.