12 Revolutionary Principles For Marriage

Shaunti Feldhahn & Jeff Feldhahn

We are excited about the journey you begin by reading our two books. We know from personal experience that it can be life changing!

In the years since first writing For Men Only and For Women Only, we've been overwhelmed with how God is using the truths in these books to change lives. One husband e-mailed us recently to say:

I just wanted to thank you for saving my marriage. Applying what I learned in your book has yielded dividends far beyond my wildest expectations, and the best part is, it was easy!  My wife and I are now confiding our deepest ambitions, fears, hopes, and dreams with each other again. In short, I feel like I did when I first met my cute, little redhead best friend in college!

We felt the same when we started understanding these principles and applying them in our marriage. They are so simple - yet revolutionary!

Now you and your spouse are about to experience the same "Aha!" moments that have helped millions of couples get their marriages off to a good start, find understanding and healing, or keep great relationships going strong.

The truths and tips you'll find in these books come from the professional groundbreaking surveys and thousands of interviews we performed in our quest to find out what makes men and women tick.

The observations and ideas found below come from the many marriage conferences we have spoken at since the books came out, where we've learned how men and women can get the most out of this information.

Whether you're starting out in married life, feeling like you want to give up, or simply eager to take your relationship to the next level, you're about to discover things you never knew about each other. So jump in and have fun - you might just meet each other again for the first time!

Shaunti Feldhahn

Jeff Feldhahn

P.S. Take the survey and check out the resources (including the companion discussion guides to these books) at the "Books and Studies" section of www.shaunti.com.

Twelve Tips to Get Great Results from For Couples Only

 1. Be ready to discover something new about yourself as well as your loved one (spouse, fiancé/fiancée, or boyfriend/girlfriend).

 2. Recognize that your significant other probably doesn't know about you what you think he or she does. We often assume, "She should know how that makes me feel", or, "He's doing that on purpose to hurt my feelings", when the truth is often the exact opposite. Reading these books is the other person's opportunity to learn how you feel and your opportunity to see what your mate didn't know!

 3. Be willing to confront the subconscious assumptions you bring to the process, and have your eyes opened. For example, a woman tends to believe she is the one with the better relationship skills and thus thinks her man needs to learn to relate better. Instead, she can realize that the way he's wired to relate is different but totally legitimate. And a man tends to believe women are "random" and impossible to fully understand, so when he sees perplexing behavior, he is likely to discount it. Instead, he can realize she can be understood, assume there's a legitimate reason for her perplexing behavior, and look for the reason - which will help him understand her better the next time around.

(More tomorrow)

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God bless your marriage and your family. 

Jim