Sexy Communication

By Gary Chapman

In a society that is saturated with sex, why do so many couples struggle in this area of marriage?

One of the reasons is that we fail to communicate. Your wife will never know your feelings, needs, and desires if you do not express them. Your husband will never know what pleases you if you do not communicate. I have never known a couple who gained sexual oneness without open communication about sexual matters. You cannot read each other's minds.

Make a list of suggestions you would like to make to your spouse that would make this part of the marriage better for you. If you would like to read a list made by other husbands and wives see my book: The Marriage You've Always Wanted. Communication is the road to finding mutual sexual fulfillment in marriage.

Understanding Sex

What is the purpose of sex in marriage? What was God's design? I want to suggest three reasons clearly revealed in Scripture.

  1. First, and most obvious is procreation or reproduction. It was God's design to provide a safe haven in which to rear children.

  2. A second purpose is companionship. Sex is designed to be a bonding experience. The biblical term is: The two become 'one flesh'. It is deep deep companionship. I believe that is why it is reserved for marriage. It is our unique expression that we are 'one'. 

  3. A third purpose for sex in marriage is for pleasure. If you doubt this, read The Song of Solomon in the Bible. God's design was mutual sexual pleasure.