Find Something That Makes You Both Laugh

By Les and Leslie Parrott

Laughter bonds people. Any good friend will tell you that laughter is the shortest distance between two people - especially in marriage. But one never knows what's funny to others.

In a survey of over fourteen thousand Psychology Today readers who rated thirty jokes, the findings were unequivocal. "Every single joke," it was reported, "had a substantial number of fans who rated it 'very funny,' while another group dismissed it as 'not at all funny.'"

Apparently, our funny bones are located in different places. Some laugh uproariously at the slapstick of Larry, Moe, and Curly-Joe, the Three Stooges, while others enjoy the more cerebral humor of Woody Allen.

Wherever you are on this continuum of humor, one thing is certain: Laughter, on a daily basis, is like taking a vitamin for your marriage. And it is a healthy habit all loving couples enjoy.

Laugher is good medicine, literally. It has important physiological effects on you and your soul mate. The French philosopher Voltaire wrote, "The art of medicine consists of amusing the patient while nature cures the disease." Modern research indicates that people with a sense of humor have fewer symptoms of physical illness than those who are less humorous. This idea, of course, isn't new. Since King Solomon's times, people have known about and applied the healing benefits of humor. As Proverbs tells us, "A cheerful heart is good medicine." (17:22)

Take it from the professionals: Legendary comedian Bob Hope says laughter is an "instant vacation." Jay Leno says, "You can't stay mad at somebody who makes you laugh." And the great Bill Cosby says, "If you can find humor in anything, you can survive it." Researchers agree. Studies reveal that individuals who have a strong sense of humor are less likely to experience burnout and depression and they are more likely to enjoy life in general - including their marriage.

We believe the more you laugh together, the more you love your spouse.

"Laugh out loud," says Chuck Swindoll. "It helps flush out the nervous system." On another occasion Chuck said, "Laughter is the most beautiful and beneficial therapy God ever granted humanity."

Arnold Glasgow said, "Laughter is a tranquilizer with no side effects." The point is that even when you've had a tough day, or should we say especially when you've had a tough day, you need to laugh. It will help wash away the stress and keep the two of you together when you're coming unglued. So help each other to find something funny even when it's not easy.

Study your spouse's funny bone.

One of the reasons many couples never reach their "laughter potential" is because they have never taken humor seriously. Sounds strange, but to bring more laughter into your relationship, you need to know what makes your husband or wife laugh. After all, each of us has a unique sense of humor.

Of course, some people never crack a smile at something almost everyone else thinks is hilarious. So your job is to find those things your partner thinks are most funny by paying attention to when he or she laughs.