Daily Tips from The Marriage Library.com
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Five Love Languages: Physical Touch

 
By Gary Chapman
 
October 21, 2011                                                                             Issue 807    

  

Summary of this article

 

Gary Chapman made famous his research and discovery of the Five Love Languages. They are Physical Touch, Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Acts of Service, and Gifts. Here is a sample of his explanation of the one called Physical Touch. This paradigm definitely has practical value in helping us understand each other and showing others that we love them by "speaking the language they understand".   

 

God bless your family and your marriage.

 

Jim   
 

Five Love Languages: Physical Touch

 

By Gary Chapman

Keeping emotional love alive in a marriage makes life much more enjoyable. How do we keep love alive after the "in-love" emotions have evaporated? I believe it is by learning to speak each other's "love language." This week we will focus on physical touch.

 

For some husbands, when they hear the words physical touch, they immediately think of sex. But sexual intercourse is only one of the dialects of this love language. Holding hands, kissing, embracing, back rubs, or an arm around the shoulder are all ways of expressing love by physical touch.

 

Physical touch can make or break a marital relationship.

 

Do you know how to speak this love language? To the spouse whose primary love language is physical touch, nothing is more important than your tender touches. You may give them words of affirmation or gifts, but nothing communicates love like physical touch.

 

Touches may be explicit and call for your full attention, such as a back rub or sexual foreplay. They can be implicit and require only a moment, such as putting your hand on his shoulder as you pour a cup of coffee.

 

Once you discover that physical touch is the primary love language of your spouse, you are limited only by your imagination. Kiss when you get in the car. It may greatly enhance your travels. Give a hug before you go shopping. You may hear less griping when you return. Remember, you are learning to speak a new language.

 

When you reach out with tender touch, you create emotional closeness. This is especially true if the primary love language of your spouse is physical touch. You may say, "What if I'm just not a toucher? I didn't grow up in a touchy-feely family." The good news is that you can learn to speak this love language. It can begin with a pat on the back, or putting your hand on their leg as you sit together on the couch.

 

Almost instinctively in a time of crisis, we hug one another. Why? During these times, we need to feel loved more than anything. All marriages will experience crises. Disappointments are a part of life. The most important thing you can do for your wife in a time of crisis is to love her. If her primary love language is physical touch, nothing is more important than holding her as she cries. Your words may mean little, but your physical touch will communicate that you care. In a time of crisis, a hug is worth more than a thousand words. Physical touch is a powerful love language.


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Jim Stephens
The Marriage Library
 20112011