Apologies And Forgiveness

By Gary Chapman  

If love became a way of life in their marriage, this couple would not allow bitterness to grow between them.

They would still offend each other at times, intentionally or unintentionally. But the offender would be quick to apologize, and the offended would stand ready to forgive, remembering that there can be no long-term positive relationships without apologies and forgiveness.

If love were a way of life in John and Charlotte's marriage, Charlotte would be quick to apologize for staying out later than she intended, and John would accept the apology and not hold it over her in the future.  

True love would also help John to see how his own weaknesses contributed to the situation. It was the first time that school year, in fact, that he had picked up the kids and seen them through their afternoon routine, and he'd only agreed to do so begrudgingly. A spirit of forgiveness and confession would allow John to see that selfishness on his part contributed to Charlotte's desperate need to relax with friends.

It was obvious to me that the incident John described was just one of the string of incidents over the years in which one person felt he or she had been wronged. Both John and Charlotte spoke with resentment about the stress in their marriage, hours spent at work, and even each other's attitude toward their children.

If love became a way of life in their marriage, bitterness would not grow between them.

They would still offend each other at times, but the offender would be quick to apologize, and the offended would stand ready to forgive. There can be no long-term positive relationships without apologies and forgiveness.

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Article written by Dr. Gary Chapman. Based on the book, Love As a Way of Life by Dr. Gary Chapman.